Although I have not been writing often since the launch of my newest book, I have written a bit about making lists and using this time of year when we ‘make lists and check them twice’ to also makes lists that will aid in your personal growth. Today I am writing about another kind of list. This list should be entitled: Doors I Should Close List.
A personal development adage about doors goes like this, “When one door closes, another (or a window) opens.” This adage feels a bit powerless to me. It feels as though, yet again, I was the victim of something negative happening ‘to me’. I am suggesting you be a bit proactive in your development today. I am suggesting you make a list of ‘doors’ you have walked through enough and it is time that you take an action and close the door.
To often we wait for a door to close when we should have locked the door a long time ago. The door — the relationship — be it a business, love, community or even spiritual — had served it’s purpose in our lives and our lives in theirs. The ‘reason and season’ had come and gone, yet we held on. We waited for them to close the door.
Dr. Success Challenge: Make a list of doors (relationships) you should respectfully close. If you need to take an action to close the relationship, take that action. A respectful closing might look like a letter thanking the person for being in your life and stating you will not be in communication going forward. Maybe it is a job you need to leave. Of course, find a new one or find the financial support needed to end that relationship prior to taking action, but take action.
Here is the interesting thing about actively closing a door in your relationship life — you can also choose to re-open it at some point. When you choose to respectfully end a relationship you can choose to respectfully approach that door — I mean relationship — again if something changes in the future. That is usually not the case when you wait so long that the door is slammed shut on you and you are sent scrambling to find an open window out of which to crawl.
Happy list making. Happy door closing. Happy window shopping.
Andrea Goeglein, Phd