Tag: Don’t Die

  • Bad is Stronger Than Good

    I may have written about this research before, yet I find it comes into my daily conversations. I wanted to reiterate an important message in self-help, positive psychology, personal development — or whatever you choose to call the process of life transformation — and that message is this:

    No one, no process, no program can promise you that life will be eternally happy and without pain and sorrow.  Bad things happen and we humans seem to remember those things more than we remember the good.  There is a physiological reason for that — get over it!  It is a fact. 


    However, and this is a big HOWEVER, you (and I) can traverse the sorrow and pain AND be happy.  Part of the answer is that we adjust our current attitude of ‘normal’ to meet the new situations instead of continually measuring life happiness using our past ‘normal’ as the yardstick.  That is an internal adjustment, not a statement about external realities.
    Love * Learn * Prosper
    and Remember: Live the ‘Don’t Die’ Spirit©
    Andrea T. Goeglein, Ph.D.
    Dr. Success™
    http://www.dontdiebooks.com/
    https://www.servingsuccess.com/
    866 975 3777 Toll-Free

  • Thank You

    You may notice that I use the words Thank You a lot.  I sign a lot of my correspondence using that salutation.  I do that because it causes me to pause and think before I sign off.  Do I always mean it when I use it?  No!  But there is never a time I am not striving to mean it.  For me part of the Don’t Die spirit is never missing an opportunity to transform a relationship.  For me that means never miss an opportunity to make a good relationship better, or a not so good relationship better.

     

    Thank you!
    Andrea Goeglein, PhD
    DrSuccess@ServingSuccess.com
    http://www.dontdiebooks.com/
    https://www.servingsuccess.com/
    www.Facebook.com/DrSuccessPhD

  • Self-Help Hogwash

    I do not believe the cliche “all things happen for a reason” as many use it…when something bad happens there is some ‘reason’ why it happened and your job is to find out what that reason is and learn from it.
    Hogwash.
    There is only one reason anything happens and that is because the purpose of life is the transformation of the spirit from one level of connection to our spirit to hopefully more complex levels of connection to our spirit and our spiritual source. That is the reason we live and take each breathe. What shows up in our lives are just opportunities to continue to transform — the kickin and screaming down the road of transformation is just the noise we make!
    So, how is your Monday starting out?  Peace,
    Andrea T. Goeglein, PhD
    1 866 975 3777
  • Do You Want to be a Lap Dancer?

    What is the price you are willing to pay to have financial success?

    During a business strategy call this morning I found myself using a personal example of a low water mark for financial success.  Lap dancers.

    Let me explain.  In the community I live, lap dancers out earn me by about 10 to 1.  Some might success that at 55 year old becoming a lap dancer is really not an occupational choice.  However, if you live in my community you would soon learn that is not the case.  So go with me for the moment — let’s assume I could choose to become a lap dancer and earn 10x more than I earn today per hour.

    Would I do it?  It’s legal.  This is not a question of ‘am I choosing to do something illegal to achieve financial success?’  This is a question of ‘exactly what am I willing to do to achieve fiancial success.’

    We all have to answer that question at some point in our business careers.  I found myself answering it a lot lately.  A few weeks ago someone mentioned the names of two highly intelligent men who happen to host talk shows that I think represent the ‘no water mark’ meaning the quality of the material and topics presented is so low that it does not even raise to the point of being a low standard of acceptable.  Since hosting a show is one of my many objectives, I could see clearly what I was not willing to do for success — financial or otherwise.

    Which brings me back to lap dancers.  There comes a point in striving to be successful that you must face your ‘lapdancer’ question.  Your ‘lapdancer’ maybe a rude boss, late paying clients, publicly demeaning co-workers — whatever and whoever you are ignoring just to keep earning money — and do what is right for your spirit regardless of how it effects your financial success.

    Just thoughts.  Please share yours with me.  Thank you.
    Andrea T. Goeglein, PhD
    Dr. Success ™
    www.DontDieBooks.com

  • The Psyche of Your Home

    One of the observational cliques that goes around psychology is that the condition of your physical home — how orderly things are, how well maintained and clear the environment is, if there are photos of friends and family, etc. represents the condition of your personal psyche.  One of my favorite Positive Psychology researchers and authors is Robert Biswas-Diener has again written a blog that I want to share with you.  Again, he made this contribution on the way to another incredible location — last time he was in Hawaii, this time he is off to South Africa.

    Before you read his contribution, look around your own home.  What is the condition?  Is it showing the way you are feeling?  As I write this I have begun the process of updating and renovating our master bath and bedroom.  We have not done any work on our home since 2007.  I remember how that shook things up.  I look forward with great anticipation what this upcoming work will shift in our lives.

    To read more about Robert and his work, go to www.intentionalhappiness.com  Thank you

     

    Do you live in a retreat center or a circus tent?
    By Robert Biswas-Diener, PhD

    I recently posted photos of my house on Facebook because, I realized, I love my house so much that I wanted to share it with others, if even in a small way. I don’t live in a mansion and there is nothing all that remarkable about my two car garage or wooden deck. My house is not necessarily the cause for any bragging rights. My home does have a unique feature, however; a small river running through the lush, fern filled yard that feeds the massive cedar trees that rise up like towers. The natural setting in which my house is nestled has led-on more than one occasion-to guests comparing it to the quiet and serenity of a retreat center. I have come to understand that the physical environment in which I live-the color of the walls in my home, the furnishings, the lighting, the plants, and other features-play a subtle but powerful role in my well-being.

    There are many research studies pointing to the conclusion that having a view of a natural setting can be rejuvenating. Nothing new there. That’s exactly why people are willing to pay extra for ocean facing hotel rooms when they go on holiday. What is fresh, however, is a new publication by Richard Florida, an intellectual with an interest in place. Florida argues that where you live matters. Living in areas where schools are good and crime is low obviously leads to a better quality of life. Less obvious is the fact that people living in different areas derive happiness from different sources! Using Gallup survey data Florida and his research team discovered that city folk get a kick out of meeting new people, suburban dwellers emphasize safety and education, and people in the country place importance on tight social relationships. Florida suggests that there are four basic qualities to a person’s sense of place: basic needs, community, stimulation and freedom.

    1. Basic Needs
    2. Community
    3. Stimulation
    4. Freedom

    Florida is referring to whole areas-cities and societies. I thought it would be interesting to shrink his theory and apply it on a less grand scale: to my own home. It can be useful to think about the very place you live-your house or apartment-in reference to Florida’s four place qualities. Ask yourself how well your basic needs are met? For instance, is the home warm or cool enough? Do you complain about the light? Is there typically food on hand? What about your sense of community within your home? How do your friends, family members, neighbors or housemates contribute to or detract from your well-being? What about stimulation? Is your home full of opportunities to engage your mind in ways you value, or do you find yourself ducking out to get your kicks? Finally, how much freedom do you experience? Do you have a room that is a reflection of you and which you are free to decorate? Chances are, intervening in any one of these areas will translate to more satisfaction and happiness for you. I admit, I ran away with Florida’s theory and applied in on a micro scale, but I have found it to be an effective way to understand my own home and how it affects me. I suggest you take the time and try it on for yourself.

    One way of getting a more objective gauge of how happy a place your home is would be to take stock of the types of compliments you get when visitors arrive. If you take my house as an example, people are quick to point out the beautiful landscape. Calling my home a “retreat center” suggests that it scores high points on the basic needs dimension, but that it might not be the most stimulating place in the world. This is true, in fact. You won’t find TVs blaring or music blasting or people playing video games at our residence. You’ll find a group of people reading quietly. Which means, where the happiness of the Biswas-Dieners is concerned, it would be important for us to acquire games, puzzles, toys or other tools for boosting the stimulus value of our otherwise calm household. What are people saying about the place you live, and how can this point you to making small improvements in one of these four areas?

  • Long time no write

    Have you ever noticed that sometimes life requires you to stop doing things that you actually enjoy in order to do something you do not enjoy nearly as much?  Well, that is what has happened to me.  I actually enjoy writing a blog each week, sharing the blog posts of some noted and content-rich contributors, and just plain staying connected in a virtual way.

    However…you notice I did not say “here is my excuse”…sometimes life requires you to forfeit in the short term to achieve a potentially greater long term goal.  Choices, choices, choices!  Just like my cats:  Where you put your attention is where you get your results.

    Here was my choice:  Continue to write my weekly blog or lay the groundwork for my newest venture The Crooked Road of Success inspirational media company.  The new venture won out.  My first book in the Don’t Die series is out, many events are on the calendar — well booked but not yet up on my public event calendar — and trademarks and copyrights are filed.

    I’ve missed you even if you have not missed me.  Forty-six days into 2011 and a book is out, a TV segment has been filmed, a website built, the first Amazon sales completed and one fundraiser and four events booked.  Tired, yes.  Happy, yes.  Want to make me happier?  Buy the book!  Thank you.